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Thursday, October 8, 2020
You are the author your own life, make it interesting
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Saturday, September 12, 2020
Four types of political participants: Which type are you?
Generally, it is assumed that there are three types of political participants: supporters, opponents, and independents. But I feel there are four, based on what I see on social media and in real life, I divide supporters into four groups. According to me, the four groups are as follows:
Saturday, August 22, 2020
Discriminatory traditions and my battle against them
The topic of discriminatory traditions is not limited to any particular country, region, or religion, it is a widespread phenomenon. Almost all cultures and religions of the world have traditions or rituals that are openly discriminatory on its face. The discrimination can be about gender, marital status, or something else. Even today, many of these traditions are still followed with the utmost respect and dedication. There are many who find some value in these traditions, many also believe that there is nothing discriminatory in them, some even think that these traditions need to be protected just because of what they are, age-old traditions. While there can be some intelligent arguments to justify them or some need-based justifications for their existence, personally, I have not found any logical justification to rationalize most of them. I have been battling against these discriminatory traditions from the moment I became aware of their blatant discriminatory nature. One important disclaimer before you read any further, I was born and raised in a Hindu family and spent three decades of my life in India, hence, all my personal experiences are related to discriminatory traditions belonging to those two identifiers, this does not mean that such traditions only exist in India or Hinduism. People who are familiar with similar traditions in other religions or countries should feel free to comment about them, in this post, I am going to stick with my personal experiences.
I have already written about one such festival Karva Chauth. However, Karva Chauth is just one of many festivals where discrimination based on marital status exists, many others exclude the participation of widows. I personally witnessed this discrimination because I saw both my grandmothers not celebrating any of these festivals. Both, my paternal and maternal grandmother lost their husbands early in their lives, they spent most part of their life as a widow because the second marriage was out of the question for them. I know stories of quite a few widows who lost their husbands in their early twenties (some even before that) and spent the rest of their lives as a widow, but I don't know a single man who was forced to live as a widower because he lost his wife so early in his life. This impacted me really hard. There are many festivals in India that only married women whose husbands are alive are supposed to celebrate. Just a few years back there used to be a blanket ban on widows to participate in any so-called celebrations, thankfully, this has changed now, but still, there are festivals that widows are not supposed to celebrate just because their husbands are not alive. The irony is that most of these festivals claim to be about love between a husband and wife, but hardly there is any participation of husbands, and if at all husbands participate, they do as if they are some revered entities to which their wives need to be grateful or worship them just for being what they are, a husband. The sole purpose of most of these festivals is to make a wife pray for her husband's well-being and be thankful that her husband is still alive. Therefore, one of the justifications offered for not allowing widows is that as their husband is not alive widows don't have any use of such a festival. People don't even realize how insensitive this justification is. it must also be noted that there are many such festivals where a wife is supposed to celebrate the existence of her husband. But I have not seen similar festivals where a husband has to perform any ritual for his wife's well-being or be thankful for her being alive, nor men are barred from any social gatherings or forced to dress any differently based on whether their spouse is alive or not.
Also, these festivals are celebrated by many: educated and uneducated, rich and poor, in cities and in villages, within India or abroad. The appeal and popularity of such traditions are really widespread. Many men and women who celebrate these festivals know women within their own families who can't celebrate such festivals because their husband is no more. These people feel bad for such women, but that's it, they do not think that these traditions are in any way discriminatory or insensitive. Even the women who are at the receiving end of these traditions don't feel that they are being discriminated against, these women blame their own misfortune or bad karma (if not this life then from their previous life) for their fate. I never saw my grandmothers complaining about the discrimination that they faced on countless occasions in their lives. They just blamed their fate, nothing else. Most of the victims are not even aware that they are being victimized, and this is the saddest part.
My battle against these traditions started when I became aware of their discriminatory nature. As a child, I was not aware of discrimination in any form, not because it was not happening around me, but because I was not sensitized to detect and fight against it, I was taught obedience and respect. However, the training of obedience and respect did not stop me from opposing them since I became aware of the discriminatory nature of these traditions. I am trying to change them within my own family. Honestly, most of my attempts have been unsuccessful so far. I have no shame in accepting my failure and I am very well aware that there is a strong possibility that I may not be successful in changing any of these in my lifetime, but this doesn't deter me from fighting my battle. I don't participate in any such rituals, some of them are celebrated within my own family, I am not part of it, I oppose them, but the reality is that they still continue. There is also a possibility that one day things may change, and people around me might agree that I have a point, whether this will happen or not I don't know, but I know that my battle against such discrimination will continue.
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Thursday, July 16, 2020
True nationalists recognize and work on drawbacks
True nationalists do not shy away from the drawbacks or weaknesses of their country. No doubt, they are proud of their country's achievements and try to highlight them wherever and whenever possible, but they also recognize and work on the drawbacks. Without diligently recognizing and working on the drawbacks no nation can become a real superpower or leader of the world. Singing praises about past glories while completely ignoring present realities is a perfect recipe for failure. Loud chest-thumping and shouting that their country is greatest might create a notice, a social media trend, or a media buzz, but it will do hardly anything on a ground level to change any realities. This is dangerous for a developing country like India, where a lot needs to be done, as well as for a developed nation like the USA, which needs to keep up its pace ahead of other countries that are trying hard to catch up with them. When people get into the habit of only reciting past glories and hiding or ignoring present problems, they enter into a dangerous illusionary zone that blindsight them to real challenges. It takes tremendous courage to accept as a society that we committed a mistake and be willing to rectify it, it's not easy. But courageous and just societies dare to accept their mistakes, correct them, and move forward.
History should be remembered and lessons should be derived from it so that we do not repeat the same mistakes, but the real challenges always reside in the present and future, our eyes and ears should be open to those challenges. Also, people need to remember that not every criticism is meant to demean or hurt, many times listening to criticism offers an opportunity to improve ourselves. So, nationalists or non-nationalists please honestly try to recognize the drawbacks and weaknesses of your country and work on it, this is the only way your country stands a chance to become a truly great nation. This is an extremely hard path, but this is the right path, all the very best.
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Friday, July 3, 2020
Randomness
Randomness is so prevalent in our lives that it is hard to ignore it, that is why we give call it by so many different names. Many things that happen around us are a result of random happenings. We can always find reasons once the event occurs, as it is said, it is always easy to connect the dots backward. It is easy to explain once you know the full picture after the event has happened. Most of the time we can find out why an ambulance arrived within minutes and saved someone's life or why it was late and the person couldn't be saved, why some team lost from the winning situation, why we got the job, or why we didn't, why some businesses work and why some don't. However, it is hard to predict any fullproof formula for any of these things. As I said, we try our best to structure things around us so that we can avoid randomness as much as possible, but it still plays a huge role in our lives.
So, what shall we do? Just keep quiet and wait for random things to happen to us? Definitely not. We should try our best to do what we want to do and factor in the role of randomness. If things work, good, if they don't, move on. If we try our level best, the result is not in our hands, and if it's not as per our expectation, not our fault. Remember, there are many things apart from our own efforts which can be a deciding factor towards the final result. The purpose of this post is not to discourage or demotivate anyone but to make readers aware of the role of randomness and appreciate it. Once we recognize the role of randomness we tend to focus on our own efforts and not worry overtly about the end result. Anxiety, stress, tension, etc. are parts of our day-to-day lives, many times, they help us to stay focused and act as a reminder of what needs to be done. We must use all these feelings to our advantage. Appreciate the role of randomness, maybe it will help to understand or ignore some things happening around us, including some election results that even experienced pollsters get wrong. 😀
Saturday, June 20, 2020
Why banning Chinese good is not a good option for India
First, if something is of national importance and critical to national security, then the government should come into action and take cognizance of that fact. If Chinese products are harmful to India's economy or national security interests, the central govt should make them illegal. If the trade terms are unfavorable, then the Indian government should negotiate a better trade deal with China. The current central government not only has the power to do these things, but they also have the mandate to do it if they want. Calls for such boycotts or bans are often the result of nationalism fever which is at its peak whenever something happens at the border and gets nationwide coverage. In India, normally these border skirmishes are used as a political capital, they have a great political value especially when some major election is around the corner. One can easily see the pattern in the way these things happen, they are so predictable that many times one gets to doubt if they are choreographed for mutual benefit at the cost of the lives of poor soldiers who are used as political cash, this will be very unfortunate if true.
Second, there is a downside if you try to manipulate the market artificially. For this, let's discuss what is the downside if you eliminate the competition not by outperforming it but by boycotting or banning it. The first immediate benefit is that you eliminate a competitor. Second, you can now enjoy the monopoly, especially if you were the second-best, now, you are the best. Third, consumers are forced to come to you, not because you are the best option, but because you are the only option. These are short-term benefits. India was a closed economy for at least a couple of decades until it opened in 1991. One of the major drawbacks of this approach is that the lack of competition results in a lack of incentive to spend on R&D, and a lack of incentive to improve. Monopoly is taxing on customers' pockets, the worst, govt may seize this opportunity to control pricing and production by enacting new rules and regulations (remember the license raj era in India?).
Finally, another drawback is that things that are banned get smuggled and eventually sold in a black market for higher than their fair market price. Underground liquor sales in so-called liquor-free states of India are an ideal example of this. Bans are rarely effective in stopping something unless the govt is really serious about implementing them, and most of the time they are not serious they do it for appeasement or political reasons. This is the reason why bans rarely work.
There are many other issues that one can discuss in this context, but the main thing that should worry Indians is the effect on the quality of available products in the marketplace and what if other countries take similar steps. Any country or its people have the right to decide what is best for them, they can choose to buy or not to buy whatever they want, and Indians can do the same as the rest of the world. Indians should just remember that as other countries like to sell their products in India, Indian businesses also need to sell their stuff outside to make a profit, and shutting the doors of a lucrative market like China is not a good option at this stage. The better option is to outperform the competition and make Indian products so attractive options that customers buy them on their own merit not under the fever of nationalism because fever comes and goes, but the quality stays.
Thank you for reading and please share your opinion about this topic.
Sunday, June 14, 2020
I am with you
Mental health is a very complex subject. It is not easy for many to understand it, but everyone needs to make an effort to learn about it as we all may suffer from some mental health-related issues at some point in our lives. Whether we realize it or not, we all go through these things, the only difference is in some cases it is more severe compared to others. We all go through complex emotions, and our reactions can be vastly different towards the same incident, the intensity of emotions, and ways of expressing them differ from person to person. Many of us are vulnerable under certain situations, we feel insecure, scared, depressed, or anxious for some reason or for no reason at all. It is important to have some support during these unsettling times, it is especially important these days when families are nuclear and most people prefer to live a separate and independent life. It is not bad to be independent, rather it is a good thing, independence teaches us many valuable lessons. However, on many occasions, we need some psychological help and support, and if we are alone it is hard to find such support. We all need such support, we need someone with whom we can share our feelings, our fears, concerns, our highs and lows, where we can be ourselves without being judged. Even though we prefer to be independent and there is a physical distance that separates us, we can make use of technology to bridge that gap. Bridging this gap is now possible with the invention of social media, we all can support each other no matter where we live or how far we are from each other. Of course, it will be great to find someone like this among the people from our immediate surroundings, but if we can't, we should not hesitate to find genuine support in the virtual world.
I want to be one such support for people who need it. Please do not hesitate to reach out to me and I will try my best to be a person who could offer the required emotional support. It is easy to get in touch with me, apart from this blog, I am on social media platforms like Facebook and Twitter. I believe that offering someone support or hearing ear or encouragement is not a favor but can be a very rewarding experience for both people involved in it. I have done it on multiple occasions, someone did it for me when I needed such support and in both cases, it has enriched my life. Emotional exchanges are not easy, one has to cross a barrier before sharing their vulnerable side with others. Crossing this barrier can be easy for some and extremely difficult for some, it's a personal journey and personal challenge. It is true that emotional exchanges cannot be a one-way process, there needs to be a connection. Unless both people connect with each other there can not be a proper exchange of emotions, and there cannot be a bridge through which emotions can cross from one person to another, such connection is crucial. However, establishing an emotional connection does not always mean one can feel the pain or fear to the same extent as the next person is feeling, it is important to understand those feelings. It is extremely hard if not impossible to understand what exactly another person is going through. I have learned it through personal experience, it's easy to say "things will get normal," "be strong," or "don't worry," but sometimes things never get back to normal, people don't want to be strong, or they cannot stop worrying. A person who is offering support needs to recognize these feelings and then only can offer any useful support to someone going through an emotional crisis.
Depression or any other mental issue is real and let's talk about it. There is no shame in asking for help when we need it. People of all genders, sexual orientations, and social or economic backgrounds might go through mental health-related issues. Let's try to support each other and devote as much time as we can to help each other whenever one of us needs such help. I know that not everyone will be interested in devoting their time to this nor everyone can find some time to do this, let's try to contribute as much as we can within our limits. But if it is please consider it, mental health is as important as physical health, and if we can develop a community that can support each other's mental health, let's do it. Remember, I am with you if you need me.
Thanks for reading and please share your opinion about this topic.
Saturday, June 13, 2020
Getting comfortable with being uncomfortable
We can either choose to maintain the status quo, remain silent, allow things to remain as they are, or try our best to induce a change in the right direction, the choice is always ours. Being uncomfortable is not an easy thing. It makes you feel uneasy, you get many questions about what and how. You might also feel responsible and guilty for not doing anything. It's a matter of choice, there is nothing right or wrong in this, one can choose to be uncomfortable about bad things happening around us or choose to ignore them thinking that there is nothing much we can do about it. I choose to get uncomfortable when I read or hear about some injustice, discrimination, harassment, or anything that challenges my sensibility, which doesn't sound right. I ask myself, what can I do to make a difference? I challenge myself to take some action, and take a step in what I feel is the right direction, no matter how small that step is. I do this not because I always think that what I do will change things or end the centuries-old traditions that I don't subscribe to, but because if it has to start from someone then why not from me? If I don't stand for what I believe, then who else will? If I look at my self-interest and safe passage and keep mum then how can I blame others for keeping silent? This is how I learned to get comfortable with being uncomfortable. As I mentioned, it is not a very desirable state as my mind continuously challenges me to do something about the things that I feel are not right, but I feel it is necessary to bring the change that I desire or preserve the values that I value.
Do you see any value in being uncomfortable? Do you see people being unfairly treated, suppressed, or discriminated which must make any sensible person uncomfortable? If yes, do you get uncomfortable after witnessing these things? If yes, then what do you do about your discomfort? If you do not feel uncomfortable, have you asked yourself, why not? These are the few questions which each of us should ask ourselves and find our own answers. These answers might make us feel comfortable about our choices or even better, might train us to be comfortable with being uncomfortable, and push our limits to strive for a better world.
Thanks for reading and please share your opinion about this topic.
Sunday, May 17, 2020
Congratulations Class of 2020
Let's raise a toast for our class and fellow graduates. We all did it and crossed the finish line successfully. Each one of us embarked on this journey with a lot of hope and expectations, we all are going to continue our journey to chase our own dreams and celebrate many more milestones. So, enjoy this moment, take a break, cherish those lovely memories that made this journey an incredible experience, and yes, do not forget to thank each and every person who made this possible, doesn't matter how you do it, call them, facetime them, video chat with them, text them, just get in touch and say thank you. Congratulations Class of 2020.
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Wednesday, May 6, 2020
My amazing journey to finish the law school
Many times, we have a dream and also the desire to pursue that dream, but we postpone our efforts or put them on hold for many reasons. Some of the most common reasons are our familial responsibilities, monetary restrictions, personal doubts or lack of confidence, or a fear of what people will say if I fail. I also had some of these concerns. I fell in love with American educational institutions way back when I started working as a postdoc at Rutgers University. The kind of experience these institutions try to provide to their students is unmatched, there are very few places in the world that are so diverse and welcoming for students all over the world. I had a dream to attend an American college or university, but the problem was I already came to the USA after finishing my formal education. Also, I did not want to get enrolled in any online degree or a short certification course, not because I do not value them or consider them any inferior, but because these things would not have provided me with complete university experience, especially on-campus university life.
I came to the US as a postdoc after finishing my Ph.D. in organic chemistry, so it was tough to justify going back to college to pursue another degree. But my dream to attend an American university remained with me, and I was searching for an opportunity to fulfill it. It is always hard to deviate from a set route to do something different. It disturbs the regularity of our lives, we need to get out of our comfort zone and do something that we could avoid if we want. Also, to chase a dream, not only do you need to have a dream but you also need to have a plan to chase it, especially if you have a family to support. I decided to give it a try in 2015 while working as a research scientist in the pharma industry. I loved my job and was well settled in the drug discovery field, I thought that it was a perfect time for me to try something different. I got interested in intellectual property (IP), and my mentor and elder brother Dr. Dev Singh germinated an idea to study law with a specialization in IP in my mind. I loved that idea as it would help me to achieve my dream of attending an American university and started working towards it. I prepared for the LSAT exam and secured a score within my desired range on the first attempt. I went through the application process and got accepted in both the law schools where I applied for their part-time J.D. program, I decided to join UConn Law School in a class of 2020 J.D. program. This is how it all started, I embarked on this exciting journey in the fall of 2016.
This journey also made me realize the meaning of the proverb "It takes a village to raise a child." I could not have done this alone. Support from my friends and family was more than crucial. My wife Reena proved to be a great companion and supporter for me during this journey. She not only took on familial responsibilities but also helped me to make some important law school-related decisions. Her conviction and fearlessness were a great help to me whenever I was in doubt. My professors and classmates were other pillars of support for me. I was skeptical if I could survive the "Socratic method" of teaching in American law schools if I could manage my full-time job and rigorous law school curriculum which involves a crazy amount of reading. However, my classmates and professors offered me all the support that I needed. My professors encouraged me, they believed in my abilities, appreciated my struggle and hard work, helped me to work on my weaknesses, praised my strengths, and offered constructive criticism wherever and whenever required. My classmates were very supportive not only did they welcome me with an open heart but also offered to borrow their books and notes, welcomed me to study groups, and arranged those group sessions on time convenient to me. My friends and family, especially Dr. Dev Singh and his family encouraged me to keep on working towards my goal, they all acted as my cheerleaders. I am indebted to all these people for their contributions and efforts to help me succeed in my dream.
Monday, May 5, 2020, was the last day of my law school classes. Now, no more classes to attend, no more assignments, no pressure for exams, and no anxiety to tread through the heavy traffic after finishing my work to reach the class on time. The memories that I created during these four years are priceless. Thank you from the bottom of my heart to everyone who made my dream a reality. Yes, dreams do come true, just give it a try.