Elections and democracy

Are elections enough to demonstrate that the country is a liberal democratic country? 

Many may answer in the affirmative and they won't be entirely wrong. But are only elections enough? Not really. There are many countries where elections are held, and governments claim to represent their people, but they can't be called democracies, for example, Russia and China. India claims to be the largest democracy. If we go just by claims, China should be considered the largest democracy, India may overtake them soon, but currently, China is the most populist country and claims to be democratic. However, many don't accept China to be a Western-style liberal democratic country, and hence India is considered the largest democracy in the world. I have participated as a voter and witnessed Indian elections since my childhood until I left for the US. It is true that elections are held regularly in India at various levels, starting from the local city or village level elections to national elections. Voter bribing, voter intimidation, or voter fraud allegations are leveled after every election. At some point booth capturing and violence during campaigning and voting used to be common. Even today after shifting to so-called more secure voting machines, voting fraud is regularly alleged, and some constituencies need to go for repoll due to voting-related issues. Even after all this, the election is not an issue, what happens during and in between elections is a better indicator of the health of any democracy. Whether personal rights are protected and respected across society, how vocal is the opposition and how much coverage it gets in the media, and whether there is any opposition intimidation (like in China and Russia) are some of the parameters that can be used to check the health of democracy at any given time. India does not perform well on many of these parameters consistently. These things happened in the 70s during the regime of Indira Gandhi, there was an official emergency declared curbing many personal rights and opposition intimidation. Not surprisingly, these things still happen after more than four decades. When the voters don't question the party they vote for, they defend each and every action of their party, and then there is no incentive to do the right things. When there is no accountability and repercussions, why any government or party will change? In a democracy, the majority gets the right to govern and implement its election manifesto, however, it does not get any rights to suppress or intimidate the minority. When personal rights are subjective and depend on who you support and who is in power, and the judiciary fails to step in and check this abrogation of personal rights, then society lives in fear and intimidation. The illusion of democracy is not a democracy. 

Therefore, conducting elections is not enough for democracy, many times, what happens in between the elections is more important than the elections. 

Thank you for reading and please share your views on this topic. 

© Vinay Thakur, All rights reserved, Vinay can be reached at thevinay2022@gmail.com 

Sports rivalry and a life lesson

The FIFA World Cup recently got concluded. The world witnessed one of the best finals played ever. Keeping aside issues related to the organization of this World Cup and corruption charges against FIFA, it was an entertaining event. Messi, who was desperately trying to conquer the only remaining frontier in his illustrious career, helped his team win the much-coveted title after 36 years. And how can we forget another rising star, Mbappe, who plays for the same club as Messi, at the age of 23 already played in two World Cup finals, and was part of the French team that won the last World Cup. The final did not disappoint, it lived up to the hype and excitement. The game was a roller coaster ride after the first 80 minutes when Argentina looked like cruising towards their much-awaited World Cup triumph with a 2-0 lead. The way Mbappe brought his team back into the game by nullifying Argentina's leads was amazing. Unfortunately, the finals can have only one winner, so even though both teams played a great game, Argentina beat France on penalties to win their third World Cup title. 

I started watching football after learning about the magical skills of Maradona when Argentina won the World Cup in 1986. I was heartbroken when Argentina lost in the 1990 World Cup finals. When it comes to playing, I prefer cricket, another team sport, I have played cricket since my childhood and even play now also whenever I get a chance. Competitive sports always amazes me. People watch them not only for fun but also for inspiration, they try to look for heroes and icons that can inspire their generation or country. Many times, such icons get elevated to the status of a cult, Pele, Mohammad Ali, Michael Jordan, Maradona, Sachin Tendulkar, Zidane, Ronaldo, and Messi are just a few examples of such cult sports icons. Also, rivalries in sports are intense. However, I like it when players play intensely against each other and shake hands at the end of bitterly fought contests. There are exceptions where teams fight and things get ugly or when teams mock their opponents. I love the spectacle where winners try to console losers and shake hands acknowledging their efforts. Appreciating the efforts of your opponent after a bitterly fought contest is not an easy task, no matter on which side you are. I wish people learned an important life lesson from competitive sports. Respecting and appreciating the efforts of our opponents is something for everyone to learn. Try to give everything when you are on the field, but once the final whistle is blown and the match is over, shake hands with each other and move on, no matter what is the result. If you win, acknowledge the efforts of your opponents and wish them better luck next time. If you lose, congratulate the winners and resolve to come back and try harder next time. Come out of that game with some lessons and resolve. Try to come out not only as a better player but also as a better person. 

Sports and rivalry go hand in hand, but rivalry does not teach us to hate our opponent. It teaches us to make every effort to defeat our opponent, to be better than them, and to try to do our best. It doesn't teach us to hate our opponent, it doesn't teach us to throw them out of the arena, it doesn't teach us not to play by the rules, and it doesn't teach us that there should not be any opponent. We live in a world with diverse opinions and views. It is impossible that we all will agree all the time. There will be disagreements, many times, on very sensitive issues. Sometimes, we lose or win bitterly fought battles either in elections or in courts. In both cases, we should understand that the other team was also fighting for their team and is part of our society, we need to live with them and not without them. This is why it is necessary to respect our opponents. Respecting does not mean agreeing with them, it does not mean not opposing them, and it does not mean not pointing out their flaws and mistakes. Respecting means acknowledging their right to fight for their cause, acknowledging their efforts, and agreeing that even after defeat they also have the right to exist and build their team as much as we have. These simple steps will reduce the amount of hatred and polarization that we are witnessing around us. I hope as we talk and cherish memories of grand sporting events, we also learn the lesson to appreciate our own victories and defeats and treat our opponents with the respect they deserve.  

Thank you for reading and please share your views on this topic. 

© Vinay Thakur, All rights reserved, Vinay can be reached at thevinay2022@gmail.com 

Don't underestimate the power of dissent

It is not easy to raise your objection when no one seems to be bothered by that issue. It is not easy to question when it is only you who feels that whatever is happening is wrong, but everyone seems to be okay with it. It is not easy to fight against powerful institutions like traditions, culture, religion, society, and political parties alone. It is not easy to stand up against your family and friends. It is not easy to question our employer, especially, when our family depends on that job. It is not easy to speak up in a silent forum. It is not easy to resist a bully. I can add many more items to this "it is not easy" list, but I think you get my point, it is not easy to register your dissent when no one else is dissenting.

Dissent is not easy, it is scary and intimidating to go against the flow. It is hard to ignore that many chose not to speak and there must be some rationale behind it. However, if you are a sensitive person, it is hard to escape the guilt of not speaking up when you must have. It is impossible to look another way when you know whatever is happening is wrong. We only keep quiet if we underestimate the power of dissent. A single dissenting voice may not be enough to stop injustice at that moment, but it may be enough to catalyze something that may manifest into some movement in the near future. We should not underestimate the power of our dissent, even when we feel scared or intimidated. Things are not always smooth for people who choose not to ignore and speak up instead of keeping mum. Even if we gather all our courage and stand up, we may find ourselves without any support, or worse, surrounded by people who are not very receptive to our questions and objections, that is, we get attacked rather than being supported. These situations are not easy to handle. It sucks to be alone while taking on a powerful entity. Therefore, it is important to be convinced about our own stand and be sure about our own beliefs and strengths before testing them. We should test our beliefs regularly, read about them as much as possible, get to know all sides, verify, and get convinced that challenging the status quo is the right thing to do. Once we do our due diligence and conclude that we need to stand up, then what we do depends on our strength and courage. If we really believe in our values and principles, we don't worry if we are alone and no one supports us. Many changes and movements started because some courageous people decided to speak up. Remember, Galileo was alone when he challenged age-old beliefs, but he was sure about his ideas and knew that the prevailing beliefs were wrong. In the end, he was proved to be right, this is an example of the power of a single dissenting voice. Don't underestimate the power of dissent, we all can be Galileo in our own way, we just need that conviction and courage to speak up.

Change takes time. Often, it is a slow and painful process, some changes we desire may not be possible in our lifetime, but someone needs to initiate it, and that someone can be us. Voice of dissent is a powerful weapon to initiate change. When someone decided to speak up about voting rights for women the women's suffrage movement started the decades-long fight for women's right to vote in the United States. When someone decided to speak about segregated schools, the fight to outlaw school segregation began. There are countless examples of such courage and conviction where a dissenting voice catalyzed a movement that resulted in a mass movement to force the change that was once deemed impossible. Believe in yourself and your convictions. Believe in the power of your dissent, you might be at the cusp of starting a revolution.  

Thank you for reading and please share your views on this topic. 

© Vinay Thakur, All rights reserved, Vinay can be reached at thevinay2022@gmail.com   

Difficulty of getting out of abusive relationships

Whenever news related to an abusive relationship becomes public, people start wondering why the person getting abused didn't quit the relationship when the abuse started. Why stay in an abusive relationship for so long? How difficult it is to understand that serial abuser is not going to change? These are the few questions asked to the victims of abuse. Maybe these questions are well intended and arise from the frustration and helplessness of seeing the victim suffer, but many times such questions are asked to question the intent of the victim. In most of these cases, a woman is the subject of abuse and some of these stories end with a tragic murder or a suicide where the woman pays with her life the cost of staying in that relationship. Why do people find it difficult to come out of abusive relationships? Is it a matter of choice, social conditioning, society's attitude, fear, or something else? Unfortunately, the answer is not that simple, it may involve any one, all, or more than the aspects mentioned here.

A few glaring problems that make it difficult to come out of an abusive relationship are financial dependence and patriarchal culture. In most households, even today, it is the woman who has to make compromises with their career for the sake of the family. Many women find it difficult to re-enter the job market after taking breaks to fulfill family responsibilities, most of the time these responsibilities are related to parenting. This makes them dependent on their partners for financial stability and their partners take full advantage of this dependency. Where will you go and how will you survive alone are the two questions asked to the victims of abuse if they are financially dependent on the abuser. This is not an easy question to answer. Not everyone is educated about the legal process of divorce and their rights under family law. Even in the legal process, the more financially resourceful party tries to game the system and play every trick to pay the fair share to the other party. Many abusers manipulate their victims by taking advantage of the victim's dependency and vulnerability.

Another reason is the patriarchal culture, where a single woman is forced to feel insecure and targeted as a vulnerable target. This situation is changing in some developed countries but in many countries even today it is not easy to live as a single woman. This forces many women to tolerate their abusive partner. Many of them feel that it is better to tolerate a known abuser rather than deal with a new one every single day. Even the families of many victims advise them not to quit such relationships and try to adjust and this advice to adjust is mostly offered to the victim. Many times victims are advised that having a child will resolve the relationship troubles, or in the beginning things are a little rocky and they will settle as time passes, these are other reasons why people get stuck in such relationships. This is a shameful situation, but it is a reality in many places around the world. 

Whenever abuse victims fail to challenge abusers or come out of an abusive relationship we as a society need to introspect. Yes, whether to quit or take some other corrective action is the victim's choice, but do we make it easy for them to make this choice, in some cases, do we even offer them this choice? Why can't we offer a safe environment where these victims can raise their voices without being worried about the repercussions? Why can't we make these victims feel confident that society will stand behind them if they come out and expose their abuser? Why can't we stop questioning the intent of the victim rather than making sure of their safety and mental well-being? Until we take such steps we are not going to make it easy for victims of abusive relationships to come out of those relationships. It is not just the abuser, but we as a society are also equally responsible for making it difficult to quit abusive relationships. Whenever you see such situations please try to offer as much help as you can, many times, offering moral support can build confidence to take corrective actions. Let's make it easier for abuse victims to make the choice to end the abuse, as a civilized society we can at least do this much.   

Thank you for reading and please share your views on this topic. 

© Vinay Thakur, All rights reserved, Vinay can be reached at thevinay2022@gmail.com

Our comfort zones

"Get out of your comfort zone." This has become a cliche, we hear it all the time, but still, it resonates with many of us. Why? Why are we so scared of getting out of our comfort zones? One of the reasons is that it is scary to get out of our comfort zones. No matter how bad they are, we get used to our current surroundings because they are predictable. Anything unpredictable sounds riskier than our current situation, which is why most of us are scared to take risks. It must be noted that the word "comfort" used here has nothing to do with physical comfort it implies our familiarity with the situation and fear of the unknown rather than a feeling of material comfort. 

If we are exposed to any situation for long enough, we get used to it, and most of us behave this way. Whether it's our job, neighborhood, house, relationship, family, school, country, or anything. We know what to expect, we can guess the consequences of our actions and plan accordingly. This predictability gives us a sense of comfort, a zone in which we feel in control, at least on our own actions. Anything out of this zone is unpredictable and hence scary. Most of the time if we get comfortable in a bad situation we fear getting into a worse situation than the current one and hence hesitate to take any action. However, the truth is that nothing improves until we take the risk and move out of our comfort zone. We need to face that uncertainty and fear. We need to dare to challenge the status quo, the result may not be what we expect, but it is worth giving it a shot. If we are going to go down it is better to go down fighting. One example of such fear is to give enough time to find a suitable job or career. There is a huge pressure on us to work once we finish our education. The pressure is very high. People start asking about their future jobs while students are still in the last year of their college. This makes students anxious and forces them to have some job no matter whether they like it or not. They want a job offer just to show that they are on track, not because they want that job. Taking your time to figure out what you want to do is getting out of your comfort zone. Choosing a career of your liking and preference than opting for obvious and safe choices is getting out of your comfort zone. It's not always doing something that defines getting out of our comfort zone, not doing something, not following the traditional path, not falling for propaganda, and not opting for the so-called American dream is also getting out of our comfort zones. It takes courage to do things, and at the same time it takes courage not to do things that everyone expects from you but you don't want to do. 

Getting out of our comfort zone is an adventure, it is a personal choice and challenge. I understand that not everyone may want to do this. Being happy in our comfort zones is not a bad thing if this is what makes us happy. But if you are not happy or content, you want something more, or want to change things, then take that step, and get out of your comfort zone. Challenge yourself and test your abilities. Things will be unpredictable and a little scary. But this is what adventure looks like, unpredictable and a little scary. Remember, most people regret things they didn't do rather than things they did. So, if you are looking for some challenge, get out of your comfort zone, and chase the dream you always wanted to chase. Make sure to prepare yourself for this challenge, as any risk without preparation is a recipe for disaster. So, get ready and start your journey, you won't regret it.

Thank you for reading and please share your views on this topic. 

© Vinay Thakur, All rights reserved, Vinay can be reached at thevinay2022@gmail.com