Aging Can be Cool

Aging is a natural process for every living being. This is the name given to our natural progression from birth to death. It is an unavoidable and natural progression of life, humans have always been comfortable with aging, and age in itself has been a widely respected attribute in many cultures across the world. However, Somewhere along the way, we started treating aging like a problem to be solved rather than a journey to be embraced. Wrinkles became something to hide. Grey hair became something to cover. And the word old—once associated with wisdom, experience, and grace—became a synonym for "uncool," "irrelevant," or "unattractive." 

The stigma around aging is louder than ever in today's social media era. People do so many things to hide their age or specifically "not to look old." Entire industries thrive on our collective fear of growing and looking old. What was once targeted at people in their 40s or 50s is now aimed at those as young as 24. We are instilling fear of aging at a very young age. “Start fighting age before it even shows.” This isn’t just marketing - it’s mental conditioning and fear-mongering. We’re teaching people in their twenties to be afraid of looking thirty.

What makes it worse is our casual language. The way we casually use the terms "young" to mean "cool" or "beautiful" and "old"  to mean "dated" or "ugly" creates a perception that being old means uncool and something to be scared of. We say things like “She looks so young for her age!” as a compliment or use “old” as shorthand for boring, outdated, or unattractive. When “young” means cool, beautiful, or worthy, then what does that make “old”? The message sinks in, often unnoticed but deeply felt: growing older means losing value.

This has resulted in people spending considerable portions of their income just on their looks, especially, to look younger than their age as they feel that natural looks for their age are not socially acceptable anymore. And it’s not an equal-opportunity issue. Women, in particular, bear the brunt of this burden. They face more rigid beauty standards, more scrutiny, and more pressure to look forever youthful. Body shaming disproportionately affects women - at work, in relationships, and in society at large. Often, it's not just society doing the shaming, it’s other women, too. The internalized pressure is that strong.

But here’s the truth: aging is not a flaw—it’s a privilege.

People often forget that not everyone gets to grow old. Aging means you’ve lived your life. You’ve endured and survived. You’ve learned and grown. Each wrinkle tells a story. Each grey hair is a milestone. Strength doesn’t only belong to the young, there’s a different kind of strength that grows with age: emotional depth, self-awareness, resilience, perspective, and wisdom. So, how do we change the narrative?

Let's start by changing the connotation of the word old. Being old shouldn’t mean being less than your younger version, it shouldn't mean being uncool, dated, or weak. It should mean being more than your younger self - more experienced, more layered, more compassionate, more poised, more nuances, more human. We need to stop praising people for “not looking their age” as though looking your age is something shameful. Let’s normalize aging faces, celebrate changing bodies, and value character over cosmetic perfection.

Aging isn’t something to battle or run away from. It’s something to live, experience, and celebrate. And honestly, aging can be cool. We can make it cool - by honoring the people who’ve walked longer roads, by rejecting toxic beauty ideals, and by proudly becoming those people ourselves. Because if we’re lucky, we’ll all get old someday. Everyone wants to live long, so why fear age? Why not make it something worth looking forward to?

Thank you for reading, and please share your views on this topic. 

© Vinay Thakur, All rights reserved. Vinay can be reached at thevinay2022@gmail.com 

Our EGO: Friend, Foe or Something In-between?

The word "Ego" has garnered a lot of negative baggage over time. It’s often used to describe someone arrogant, overconfident, or condescending. In everyday language, having an ego is seen as a flaw - a serious personality defect that must be corrected or diminished. However, in reality, we all have an ego. It is an essential part of our psychological makeup, a core element of what makes us human, the ego isn’t inherently good or bad. It simply is. It plays a pivotal role in shaping our sense of self, qualities like self-respect, resilience, and confidence, originate from our ego. These qualities, so vital to our personal and professional lives, originate from a healthy ego and, in turn, nurture it. No one is free from the ego and we cannot get rid of our ego. The only difference lies in how we acknowledge it and work with it.  

Our ego is like our shadow, always present, even if not always visible. Just as a shadow shifts with the light, the ego shifts with our experiences, our emotions, and our environments. Sometimes it’s right in front of us, casting a long and unmistakable presence. Other times it fades into the background, quietly guiding our decisions and reactions. And just like our shadow, while we might not always see our own ego clearly, others often do see and feel it. Recognizing this shadow doesn’t mean we need to get rid of it. In fact, we can’t. The real challenge and opportunity lie in learning how to live with it, work with it, and even grow with it.

There are certain benefits of a healthy ego. A balanced ego serves us in countless ways. It helps us to build self-respect by establishing boundaries, advocating for ourselves, and demanding fair treatment. It gives us the courage and confidence to take risks, express our ideas, and pursue our goals. It supports us in bouncing back from setbacks, defending our worth, and continuing forward with determination thereby instilling resilience. Our ego contributes to our sense of individuality and purpose, helping us define who we are thereby building our unique identity. When nurtured mindfully, the ego becomes a reliable companion - quietly fueling our growth and helping us stand tall without stepping on others.

Of course, there are certain downsides to having an inflated ego or not having an ego at all. Having a healthy balance is key. An unchecked or inflated ego can be destructive. When ego swells beyond self-confidence, it can breed superiority and insensitivity resulting in arrogance. An oversized ego often resists feedback and fears vulnerability, limiting growth and connection. Remember, there is a very thin line between being arrogant and rigid and being confident, and people often forget this. Ego-driven pride can push others away and hinder collaboration, resulting in isolation, especially when you fail or going through tough times. Also, the complete absence of ego can be equally problematic. Without ego, we may struggle with asserting ourselves or recognizing our value resulting in the feeling of low self-worth. A diminished ego can make us insecure and overly reliant on external validation. The ego helps define identity and purpose; without it, we may feel lost or aimless. Therefore, finding the middle path is the key.

Rather than demonizing or denying the ego, we can aim to understand it and work with it. Self-awareness is the key. Recognize when your ego is helping you rise and when it might be getting in the way. Be assertive but not aggressive, understand that being polite doesn't mean being weak. Practice humility, not by diminishing yourself, but by knowing your worth without needing to prove it constantly. Ultimately, our relationship with the ego is lifelong. It's not about defeating it but learning to listen to it, challenge it, and sometimes even thank it.

Thank you for reading, and please share your views on this topic. 

© Vinay Thakur, All rights reserved. Vinay can be reached at thevinay2022@gmail.com