Motherhood - a personal choice of any women

The recent judgment about premarital sex by a court in Delhi has sparked some debate about the right of adults to choose their sexual partners. In India, there is still a very strong connection between marriage and parenthood, especially motherhood. Actually, I am a little surprised by the court commenting on the morality aspect of the act rather than the legal aspect. I don't understand why any court cares about what any religion says about anything? How things mentioned in any religion or religious texts are relevant legally? We also need to understand the effect of these types of judgments on our society. These types of judgments increase the bias against the people who don't follow these so-called moral norms. One of the issues directly related to this judgment is the issue of motherhood of unmarried adult women. This is a big NO in many societies (including India). People look down on unmarried pregnant women. They have to face a lot of humiliation, their character is questioned and even their own family might disown them because of the stigma and shame associated with premarriage pregnancies. It is difficult for women to survive with the label of "unwed mother" in most conservative societies. So the question is, do adult and independent women have the right to decide when and how they want to become mothers (or pregnant) or society should decide it? Maybe this question is irrelevant or unnecessary for many but this is very important for many women who want to bear children but are not interested in marriage. 

Many independent, working women sometimes find it really hard to find a suitable life partner, who can really understand and support them. This is all because independent and opinionated women are a recent phenomenon and not all men are comfortable with them. Men want to date outgoing, smart, and so-called modern women but ultimately they expect their wives to remain within their control. It seems our society is still not ready for independent women who can decide about everything related to their lives. Even in today's world, no organized religion gives fair and equal treatment to women. This may be because all religions are quite old and the product of a patriarchal society. All religions are heavily biased against women and obviously, therefore, we cannot use any standards used by all these religions related to women and their rights, at least I expect honorable courts to be cognizant of this. These types of judgments help to make already existing prejudice against women more strong, they even legitimize it, that's why we need to question and challenge them. 

Motherhood should be a personal choice of any adult, independent woman. Every child should be a legal and legitimate child irrespective of the marital status of their parents. Actually, any adult should have the right to decide about major things related to their own body and life. Marriage, choice of partner, and motherhood are part of a woman's personal decisions and she should have total control over these things. People around her can help whenever she needs or asks for any help and can assist her to make proper decisions but she should have the final say. I wonder how come any person with a rational mind and common sense can oppose this? Why there is such a strong desire and desperate need to control women and their bodies? Why some people are so scared of totally independent women? Women are almost 50% of our workforce, and making them independent and strong is going to help us build a strong and vibrant society. It's better to have a society that is equally sensitive towards the needs and concerns of every section. I believe everyone would love to live in this type of society. Motherhood is a personal choice of any woman, it is her personal choice and it should remain personal. 

Thanks for reading and please share your views on this topic.

[Copyright: Vinay Thakur. Please contact the author for re-posting or publishing]

Links:
1. Premarital sex 'immoral', no religion permits it: Court
2. http://www.singlemothersbychoice.org/