My recent encounter with Stockholm syndrome

Recently there was a series of comments on my post "Chanakya and his views about women." There were a few commentators from both genders who were there to criticize my post and defend Chanakya's views about women, especially the ones that I mentioned in my post. Their major objection was how come a trivial person like me can have the audacity to criticize the great Chanakya. I was not at all surprised by their language (calling me stupid or dirty or any other name, and offering unsolicited pieces of advice to me). I was a little surprised to see some educated women defending Chanakya's description of women in general. I am reproducing some of Chanakya's quotes that I used in my post. 

One should not place trust in rivers, animals with horns, armed ones, women or in ruling families.

Women are fickle minded. He also says 'Only women could speak falsehood'

Untruthfulness, rashness, guile, stupidity, avarice, uncleanliness and cruelty are women's seven natural flaws.

Fire, water, women, fool, snake and the royal family, beware of all these, they can prove fatal.

Courtesy should be learned from princes, the art of conversation from pundits, lying from gamblers and deceitful ways from women. 

So, these people were trying to tell me how all these above sentences actually describe qualities of women in general, and good women who don't have the above characteristics are exceptions but most women do have these characteristics. Their arguments are interesting and clearly show strong prejudice against women all over the world. The whole discussion continued for a long time (and still going on) and some people even posted some links to a couple of TV serials that were based on Chanakya's life to support their arguments. Their whole point was Chanakya was a genius, he was the greatest teacher India ever produced therefore "nothing" that he said can be wrong and everything should be accepted as it is. One person even said that there is some logic behind why Vedas (but never bothered to explain what logic) and Chanakya are against women's independence, below is the actual comment, reproduced as it is.

"Again you don't understand it. Its not the Women, Its the woman in the position as MOTHER you can trust. Same woman which can be trusted as mother always cannot be trusted as any other role may be( like wife). May be c is untruthful wife but always loving mother.
Man you need a brain to understand what he really wants to say. Vedic Culture not only Chanakys is against Women independence. You know why ? Precious things are not kept independent. When they have it they become cheap. What is happening to women is the Side effect of women liberation. Women are precious to us. Hence respected. But when they Show characteristics of a women not a slut. As its said Nariyal chahe kitna bhi bada ho uski jagah dali ke niche hai." 
(translation of last line which is in Hindi is, "No matter how big coconut is, its place is always below the branch")"

This is just a representative comment. One can clearly see what is the mindset of people who are trying to defend these views. Look at the sentences with too much emphasis on women's sexual conduct, addressing them as "precious things" that can not be left independent, and finally, the conclusion that no matter how big they become they will be always below men. The proverb mentioned in the comment and many other sexist proverbs like that are still used regularly to convey this disgusting message to women. These people still like to live in the medieval period of male superiority and believe me there are millions who think like this, not only in India but all over the world. What we see in the comments section of this post is just a small subset of educated people, who even after their education and experience in the outside world have such views. 

The strange but not that surprising was a few women who overwhelmingly defended these comments. This can be an ideal example of Stockholm syndrome (defined as a psychological phenomenon in which hostages express empathy and sympathy, they have positive feelings toward their captors, sometimes to the point of defending them). My friend Anila explained to me very nicely why some women are defending such statements by comparing this behavior with Stockholm syndrome. I quote her comment from my Facebook wall "in this case the kidnapper is a crippling ideology, and it is so well indoctrinated that the very subjects of abuse become the most powerful voices in favor of it." I totally agree with her, the effect of some ideologies is so strong on people that they don't see anything wrong with it even if someone points it out. Just because some famous personalities like Chanakya said these things they think that it has to be right. For centuries this was hammered on people's minds and now it has become a belief system. Chanakya was a genius of his time in various fields like politics, governance, and economics, so how can he be wrong about women? People just believe his and many other famous people's statements blindly that propagate such backward views. Most of these people's major complaint or objection is who am I to object to great genius Chanakya's views? He was great so a common man like me can not even question him. This mindset is very prevalent in Indian society, and after reading some of the comments I can see that other countries are also not that far behind. Most people don't like to see someone questioning their idols which they worship and adore. Questioning and healthy debate are most important pillars of human civilization and many people are against them especially, when their own faith and beliefs are questioned.

Women's liberation or feminist movement started very recently and in a short time, women have achieved tremendous progress in every field where they got the opportunity. However, it seems this is not enough for some people, they want statements from people like Chanakya, Vyas, Newton, or someone like these people to believe that women are equal to men. I want to tell these people that just give women some time they will prove each and every sexist statement written about them wrong, no matter whose statement it is. Some people always read and see what they want to read and see. No matter how successful women are in every field they will always point to women who are still struggling due to years of suppression and abuse and try to prove their point that women can't compete with men. It shows a sad and pathetic sexist mindset.

I hope these people who are thinking like this open their eyes and see the real world outside where women are excelling in each and every field and realize that women are achieving new heights and setting up high standards wherever they get the opportunity. I hope that some of these women who believe in very stereotyped descriptions of women also learn to believe in their own capabilities. Women should stop considering themselves as the weaker sex and also stop believing that they are inferior to men in any aspect (which was hammered on their minds for centuries). I know that it's very difficult to change people's opinions. But, I tried. We need to confront these people because these are the people who give shelter to such ideologies, propagate them, and practice them. We must try our best to stop this, my post is a small step in that direction.


Thanks for reading and please share your views on this topic.

(Copyright: Vinay Thakur. Please contact the author for re-posting or publishing)

Reference:
1. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stockholm_syndrome
2. When the bird starts loving its cage