Subtle sexism and patriarchy

Sexism and patriarchy are widely debated issues, they are insidious forces that permeate our society, often operating under the radar and manifesting in seemingly innocuous ways. I have written a few posts related to these issues. We may want to believe that our generation has really started questioning these practices, but debates about these things have been going on for decades in some form. Also, one cannot deny the significant progress that has been made toward gender equality in the last few decades years. In many societies, the situation is much better than it was just a few years ago.  

Even after all this progress, there is a long way to go. Sexism and patriarchy now exist in a very subtle and nuanced way in many societies, including developed nations like the United States. Unlike overt forms of discrimination, which are easily identifiable and condemned, every form of discrimination now exists in its subtle form. Subtle forms of sexism and patriarchy are more difficult to recognize and address, yet their impact can be equally damaging. It is possible to be sexiest without being hostile towards women, it is possible to be sexist even if you have a mother, wife, and daughters, just having female relatives doesn't give anyone the right to downplay their sexist and misogynist behaviors. Subtle sexism refers to the subtle, often unconscious biases, stereotypes, and microaggressions that perpetuate gender inequality. It can manifest in various forms, such as the gender pay gap, double standards in behavior and appearance, or the underrepresentation of women and other genders in leadership positions. Subtle sexism praises women, but only in certain contexts or for certain qualities such as kindness, patience, or motherhood. It predefines and confines a gender only to traditional gender roles. Some examples are, men not washing their own dishes, the stereotype that women are bad drivers, the tag of gold digger only used for women, and assuming that a successful woman must have used some other means to reach there whereas a man in a similar position reached there just on merit. These are just a few examples to show how gender discrimination still exists but only has shifted its means and manners. It is now more subtle and nuanced. These subtle biases reinforce gender roles and norms, perpetuating inequality and limiting opportunities for women to fully participate and thrive in society. On one side women are encouraged to take on new challenges but on the other side, they are forced to continue with their traditional gender roles making them shoulder additional burdens. And when they struggle or fail questioning the ability of the entire class. Note that when a man fails, just that man fails, no one stands up and questions whether men are qualified to do that task. But when a woman fails, she carries a burden of their gender, as many stand up and question the ability of every woman to do that task. 

Gender discrimination, misogyny, and sexism are legacies of patriarchy. Patriarchy refers to a social system in which men hold primary power and dominate in roles of political leadership, moral authority, social privilege, and control of property. While one may think that patriarchy is an outdated concept in today's progressive societies, its influence persists in subtle ways, shaping social structures, institutions, and cultural norms. On common example of the manifestation of patriarchy is the expectation that men should be assertive and dominant, while women should be nurturing and accommodating. Any man showing accomodating behaviors, especially towards women becomes a target of gossip and criticism even today. Patriarchy can also be seen in the disproportionate representation of men in positions of power and influence, such as corporate boardrooms, government offices, and media outlets. These subtle manifestations reinforce gender hierarchies and perpetuate inequality.

Addressing subtle sexism and patriarchy requires a collective effort to challenge ingrained biases, and sexist and misogynist cultural and religious practices, dismantle oppressive systems, and promote gender equality. This involves raising awareness of unconscious biases, advocating for policies that promote diversity and inclusion, and creating spaces where individuals of all genders, races, nationalities, or any other diversities can thrive and succeed on equal footing. We must recognize and confront subtle sexism and patriarchy, or for that matter any form of discrimination in all its forms. We must work towards building a more equitable and just society where everyone, regardless of gender or any other identity, has the opportunity to reach their full potential. It's a journey that requires ongoing reflection, education, and action to create meaningful chances. I am ready for this journey, are you ready?

Thank you for reading and please share your views on this topic. 

© Vinay Thakur, All rights reserved, Vinay can be reached at thevinay2022@gmail.com 

Gender sensitization is required to tackle pervasive sexism

Gender discrimination and sexism are so pervasive around us that many times we don't even realize it happening around us. It happens so routinely that our senses don't notice and start accepting gender-biased statements and behavior as if it is a normal way of life. The result, we not only start ignoring these incidents but also stop noticing them where we should. As a society and as an individual we need to evaluate things through a gender lens. Such evaluation is needed for the day as we waited too long and allowed gender discrimination to occupy too many areas of our lives. Gender discrimination is there in our homes, our relationships and friendships, movies and books, stories, the workplace, and many other places. All cultures are full of gender-discriminatory practices and rituals. Many want to preserve these discriminatory rituals because they are part of our heritage. I wonder how something becomes right because it has been going on for centuries. Rather, something discriminatory when allowed to exist for long without being questioned gets normalized, and very few dare to question it, such practices require a strong and determined resistance. The good part is not everyone gets normalized to these discriminatory practices, there are some who notice them and dare to protest. These are the ones who force the change or at least initiate the process for change. I am lucky enough to meet with some of these people either personally or through books. These interactions have sensitized me about gender discrimination and helped to realize many of my own privileges because of my gender.

The movement against gender discrimination has been going on for decades. Definitely, our society is becoming more conscious about gender equality, but a lot is yet to be achieved, and in some places, the movement is in the very initial stages. Gender sensitization, which can be defined as the modification of behavior by raising awareness about gender equality concerns, is one of the important ways to make individuals aware of gender-discriminatory practices. Once people become aware of discrimination the hope is they will fight against it or at least they won't follow such practices. I can say this by personal experience, since I became aware of various aspects of gender discrimination I started evaluating things using a gender lens. When I evaluated movies I loved, songs I admired, books, and authors I read while growing up, I realized that most of them failed the gender test. That is, most of these things were heavily gender-biased, they treated men and women in a very stereotypical fashion, and women were always shown as tolerant, sacrificial individuals, who could tolerate any injustice forced on them. Remaining silent, even when put through unjust situations, was considered a virtue for women, and a revolt of any kind was reserved for men. This is why gender sensitization is required to tackle pervasive sexism in our society. More so today because there is no more open gender discrimination as most societies know it is bad and try to project a picture that they are not gender biased. However, this does not mean that gender discrimination is not there, it is more subtle and made to look normal, that is why we need to evaluate things through a gender lens. Our gender lens should enable us to evaluate the books we read or movies we watch to make sure if they do a good job of sensitizing us about gender-related issues. I know some people will make the argument that it's not fair to judge things of the past using today's standards, and this is true, however, this does not mean we cannot call a spade a spade when we realize that it is a spade. Anything, no matter how old or new, if it perpetuates sexism, it is sexiest and we need to call it sexiest and I am glad people are doing this. Gender sensitization is not easy and many will struggle with it as it will challenge their convictions and beliefs, and put them at odds with their culture and traditions. We need to take this challenge, it's tough, but continuing with sexism is not an option we should choose, it was a wrong option yesterday, and it is a wrong option today, let's choose the right option. 

Thanks for reading and please share your opinion about this topic. 

Prevalent sexism on social media

I have noticed prevalent sexism in social media conversations, especially on WhatsApp. Unfortunately, I notice sexism very easily and I am very sensitive to it. I notice it multiple times a day, in many WhatsApp messages. I receive, jokes which people forward to me, comments they make on various social media platforms, traditions they talk about, traditions they praise about, and many other things. I tirelessly try to point it out to people around me, especially to people from my own family because first, I should make my own family aware of this prevalent sexism before I try to change rest of the world. Many times people who forward or say those things don't even realize that there is something sexist in it. The main reason behind this mindset is a deep cultural history of sexism in every society. Developed nations are taking conscious efforts to remove this sexist mindset but in countries like India with strong patriarchal culture, these things still go unchallenged. To give a simple example about this, yes I have to receive a single husband-wife related joke in Indian groups where a wife is not depicted as a money spender, totally dependent on the husband, non earning partner. By default, every joke or message has this image of the wife, occasionally there might be a message to praise sacrifice of women and laud their tolerance and dedication towards their partner, but this is again very stereotypes description of women.

I always wonder why people don't try to offer somewhat different perspective? Why even women don't take notice of such stereotyped depiction of their image? Maybe it is true that in developing countries like India there are still many wifes who are dependent on their husbands. It is not because they are any less capable of working outside their homes, but because their family structure or social and cultural settings doesn't allow them to accept any job. They are so consumed by household work, which is equally important and valuable that they can't do any other work. Traditionally, household work is valued as much as it should have been, and hence the image of stay home wifes is that they don't earn anything. This notion also results in the image of wifes as a creature who survives on husbands hard earned money without doing any hard work of their own, and all these jokes and sexist TV serials just reinforce this image on men and women's mind generations after generations.

This sexist behavior and attitude need to be questioned, I do it from my side. I get into trouble because of this, many times people get annoyed because of my net picking small small things. But the reality is, that these small things slowly build a sexist attitude in boys and girls which subsequently becomes part of cultural nuances of our society. These things then create rigid barriers, glass ceilings, gender stereotypes, and many other things which stereotype gender roles. The only way to remove sexism is to point it out and make people aware of it. If even after that they want to continue with those jokes and that attitude it's their choice, but at least make them aware that they are being sexist. This is one basic thing we all can do to curb the prevalent sexism around us and our own family or freind circle or social group is a good place to start this.

Thanks for reading and please share your views on this topic.