Get rid of your mask

Do you feel pressure to fit into society?
Are you living your life to fulfill the expectations of others around you?
Do you feel obliged to fit into a stereotyped definition of a man or a woman?
Are you doing things that don't interest you at all only because they make you look successful and accomplished in the eyes of others?
If the answer to any of these questions is yes or maybe, then you are living with a mask to project what people around you want to see in you, not what you want. Actually, among all the conditioning that has happened to us since childhood and all the chaos around us, it is not easy to decide what we really want to do. We are guided and misguided so much since our childhood that it becomes extremely hard for many of us to decide what we really want to do in our personal and professional lives. We are told to chase our dreams, but many times situations don't allow us to do that and for many of us it's not easy to decide which dream to chase as we have too many of them, or worse, some of us don't have a dream that we want to chase.

In this confused or conditioned state of mind, knowingly or unknowingly we all start wearing a mask. We don't even realize that we are wearing a mask. We start doing the stuff that others tell us is good for us. We start dreaming about a life that others say is good and happy and choose a career that others say is safe and rewarding. We want to be successful in the eyes of our parents, other relatives, and society. Nowadays, to make sure that everyone knows about our success story we start doing these things and post about them on social media so that people think that we are successful and happy. That mask forces us to choose only certain types of careers because those are only guaranteed to make us rich and happy. We hate our job but still do it as we need those big bucks which we believe will bring a lot of happiness. But the problem is, this mask makes us forget what we really want, in which things our happiness really lies, and what we would like to choose as a profession if we don't have burdens of expectations from others. That mask eventually becomes our face and we get stuck with it, rather we start believing that it's our real face.

I am not saying that getting advice from others is bad or we should not follow anyone's guidance. Many of us need some help to navigate the path of our lives and we should seek such help. But in the end, the choice should be ours, it should not be forced on us. To make such a choice and to live such independent life we need to get rid of our mask first. We need to break free from inhibitions that stop us from exploring new paths and testing our capabilities. Any career is not a bad choice if you are really good at it, but please remember that only being passionate is not good enough, one needs to acquire the required skills and expertise also to be successful in any field. If you are happy while working hard to acquire such skills and expertise this journey becomes more rewarding and fulfilling. So, get rid of your mask, look at the world with a fresh outlook, and see what difference it makes. Live life on your terms, this doesn't mean being irrational, erratic, and without any bounds, it means being rational, sensible, and practical. 

Michelangelo said, "I saw the angel in the marble and I chiseled until I set it free." We should not wait for someone else to see that angel in us, we need to find that hidden angel that resides inside all of us and make all the efforts to set it free. Getting rid of the mask that we wear to make people around us happy is one of those important steps in that direction. 

Thanks for reading and please share your views on this topic.

Mr. Modi your time starts now

BJP under the leadership of Mr. Narendra Modi has registered an impressive performance in the 2014 general elections of India. They not only emerged as the single largest party by outperforming their arch-rival Congress in almost every state, but also they secured a majority on their own which never happened in so many elections in India. No doubt this is a stunning performance and an incredible victory by any standards. There was a huge vacuum created by a very weak performance by the Congress-led UPA-2 government, BJP projected itself as a very viable alternative to solve all the problems India is facing in every sector and the results show that people believed in them. By % vote share BJP got ~30% votes all across India, which means there are still ~70% of voters who chose some other party than BJP. So there are many voters (~50%) who didn't accept either BJP or Congress (second largest single party in this parliament with ~ 19% vote share) as their choice, however, the truth is that BJP has won the majority in parliament on their own and they have a mandate in their hands to implement their manifesto.  Numbers are in BJP's favor so it will be interesting to see how they perform. After a long time, for the first time since Rajiv Gandhi won a majority for Congress in 1984, a single party secured a majority on its own in the Indian parliament. This is a unique opportunity for them, let's see how they make use of this.

During the election campaign, the BJP and its leaders made many tall promises along with equally tall claims (the so-called Gujarat model of development). They promised a uniform civil code, squashing of Article 370, and construction of a Temple in Ayodhya for so many years, and in their every election manifesto (including this one) these things were mentioned. It will be interesting to see what they do with these promises. They also promised to bring back black money from foreign banks to India and use it for people's welfare. The numbers floating in media about the amount of black money stashed in offshore accounts are ridiculously high, the range is enormous, now it will be the responsibility of the newly elected government to keep its promise and bring back that money or at least they should clarify how much truth is there in all these news articles about black money. Issues like price hikes (in every sector), the struggling economy, sluggish job market, rampant corruption in all sectors of public life, and opaque and non-accountable governance have been there for so many years, they have made so many promises to tackle these issues and I think people now expect them to deliver the results. One famous line of Prime Minister-elect Mr. Narendra Modi during the election campaign was, "You gave Congress 60 years, give BJP just 60 months." People liked his idea of seeing their fortunes change dramatically in 60 months, and they gladly gave him and his party the next 60 months to govern India, Mr. Modi promised to change India's future (hopefully in a good way) and bring development (hopefully for everyone not only for a certain section of society). Now all these people who gave them a chance with a lot of hope wait for their expectations to get fulfilled. People should be patient and wait at least for few years before forming any positive or negative opinion about this new government. There are many things that they can do immediately in many sectors which can boost people's confidence, it will be interesting to see if they are willing to take those steps. People are expecting a change in the governance not just a change in the government's face and I hope that happens.

There is one more thing that I noticed after this election, some people or groups of people are acting this if something catastrophic political disaster happened in India and its democracy is in acute danger. They think that the BJP's victory is like doomsday for the Indian parliamentary system. Maybe they have a very good rationale behind all these fears but honestly, I am a little surprised by their extreme pessimism and negative attitude towards this democratically elected government. After all, they won this election by a huge majority. One can differ with their ideology, and raise questions about the way they fought the election, the amount of money they spent during elections, and various other related issues but to question the legitimacy of their victory too much. They are trying to paint a very negative picture of India under BJP (or NDA) rule. Rather than doing all this if they are really worried about something really bad happening, they should go back to work, they should work hard to strengthen their respective organizations and spread public awareness so that even if the current government wants to do anything wrong they won't dare to do it. Crying foul and offering lame excuses for their own bad performance is not going to help them in any way. There is no doubt that India needs major electoral reforms and political parties, and their funding should come under RTI but these things are not going to happen overnight, we need to put on a long and persistent fight to make it happen. Let's see how this government performs to tackle these problems, let's see what steps they take, and how they govern. People should judge the performance of this government based on results, not based on perceptions or hypothetical scenarios. We should continue asking questions and raising important issues, let it be about 2002 (or any other) riots or fake encounters, inflation, pollution, corruption, or anything else. No government or prime minister should be immune to questioning. But it is too early to paint a doomsday picture, first, give this government a chance and see how it performs. I agree that many BJP supporters have become extremely aggressive about their attack on people criticizing their leader or party (this was clear during the election campaign). All such hyperactive supporters from all parties first need to learn how to control their emotions, if not, then at least learn how to talk in civilized language. Mr. Modi and his team don't have much time before people start asking them about the results that they promised and start evaluating their performance. Their time starts now, and it is better for our country if they utilize this unique opportunity very wisely.

Thanks for reading and please share your views on this topic.

[Copyright: Vinay Thakur. Please contact the author for re-posting or publishing]