Whose scorecard are you using?

Do we really need any scorecard to evaluate our lives? Not really, but we all use one. It is inevitable to review and judge our personal and professional lives using some parameters or scorecards. The problem is we all use the scorecard handed over to us by either our parents, friends, family, religion, or society. We are told what it means to be a successful person. Some common items of that scorecard are a degree from a reputable college/university, a high-paying job in a reputed company, a nice home, and a car, even better if you have a private jet, a loving family with kids (better if they are biological), regular vacations at exotic locations, and early retirement. These are just a few parameters ingrained in our minds to evaluate a successful person. The question is not whether these parameters are right or wrong, or whether we should judge our lives based on these parameters, but whether these parameters are selected by us or by someone else. There is nothing wrong with desiring things prescribed for a successful person by the media or society if that's what we want. However, the question is do we really want them? It would be really odd if everyone in any society wanted to live their life based on one standard scorecard. Humans are complex animals and it is impossible for all of us to desire the same things unless we all are brainwashed. We all should have our own scorecard to live a more balanced and fulfilled life. But the problem is we are not taught to develop our own scorecard. Neither our family nor education teaches us to do that. We are given examples of previously successful people are are told to idolize them. The result is most of us either have no clue how to develop our own scorecard or adopt a scorecard handed to us as our own and evaluate our lives. Once we fail to develop our own scorecard, we may score high on the one we are using but still feel empty or unhappy from inside and keep wondering why are we not feeling the happiness and fulfillment that we are supposed to feel. The reason may be that what we chased we never wanted in the first place, it's like running in the wrong race and after winning not being happy with the award. Everyone has to climb their own Everest, my challenges, difficulties, and limitations are different than most around me, I cannot judge my success or failure based on someone else. Similarly, everyone needs to have their own scorecard, other's scorecards can be used as a template but ultimately we need to come up with our own. Only and only a scorecard prepared by us by carefully analyzing our goals and limitations will do justice to measuring our success and failure. 

We all have our outer success, based on the parameters that society, our family, and other people around us value, and our inner success, this what we feel based on our own desires and passions. Most of us care a lot about outer success because that's what we are made to believe to be a universal parameter to measure success. However, only we know what defines and matters for our inner success, it may or may not include all or any of the parameters set by others defining everyone's outer success, this is why I am emphasizing preparing our own scorecard and evaluating our life based on that not based on some standard template. So, whenever you feel frustrated, feel that you are a failure, or going through a low phase in your life, don't forget to ask, whose scorecard are you using?    

Thank you for reading and please share your views on this topic. 

© Vinay Thakur, All rights reserved, Vinay can be reached at thevinay2022@gmail.com