Tuesday, May 12, 2015

Why there is a need for special days like Mother's day in today's world?

Recently Mother's Day was celebrated in the US and surprisingly also in India (at least on Facebook). There was no such concept of any such day when I was growing up as a kid in India. But now this tradition is spreading fast all over the world. Many of these days are commercialized events, many businesses and local shops depend on these days for bumper business. There is nothing wrong with celebrating any of these days, rather I believe that these days are becoming so popular because there is a genuine need and demand for them in today's market. The very hectic, busy, and stressful lifestyle in today's world leaves very little time for many people to spend with their loved ones, somewhere they feel guilty for not being able to do justice to their various relationships. For all these people such days provide an opportunity to make up for lost time and also give them a chance to acknowledge the presence and importance of that particular person in their lives. Most people's day-to-day life is getting incredibly busy, they are constantly connected to something on the internet all the time, then there is TV, work, and other distractions. Many times some relationships get lost among all this business, especially if we live apart from those people. These special days are like an opportunity to pause and recognize the contribution of some of these people in our lives, this is the positive side of these events. But there is a negative side also, many these days are heavily commercialized, so heavily that chances are there that if people find that you don't celebrate them they might consider you as a heartless or emotionless person!

Personally, I don't celebrate any of these days (Father's or Mothers' or Valentine's, etc.) not because I don't like them or I don't believe in them, but because I don't feel the need to celebrate them. So far, I always tried to give enough time to all my friends and relatives whenever they are around me. For the last decade or so I have been staying away from my parents. The first time I left my house and city was to come to the US, so one can imagine how hard it would have been for both of us, me and my parents. Like everyone else I also think that I have a very special relationship with my parents and it has definitely evolved over time. If they are in Pune (my birth city in India, where my family resides) we talk every weekend for at least for couple of hours. For me, all those weekends are like Father's and Mother's Day combined (let's call it Parent's Day). I celebrate parent's day with them every time I talk with them, we talk about various issues, and incidents from the past, and we even gossip about various things. Occasionally there are some heated discussions also, but I think that's the part of any relationship. Because of all this so far I never felt any need to wait for some special day to express my feelings towards my parents. I try to do it on a regular basis, but I do understand the need for people to have special occasions to celebrate every relationship in a special way. This is a need created by super-intelligent market in people's minds. It is impressive the way marketing tricks work on people's minds (including my own). It is interesting to see how a market captures a certain emotion and then develops some product or event around it and uses a very sophisticated and intelligent campaign to create a feeling of genuine need for that product or event. It is amazing to see how this all works and how they use various human emotions to target their customers. If we can ignore the heavy commercialization aspect of many of these special days, then we have to acknowledge that these days do mean something special for many people and I respect that. Yes, motherhood and mother's love need to be celebrated, so is father's love, so are friendships, so is the love and presence of your grandparents, and so is your partner's love and dedication. The list is not comprehensive but all these relationships are important and should be celebrated. If these days give this opportunity, there is nothing wrong with it, just grab it and do your best to express your feelings in whatever way you can. But let's also be genuine in our expressions, nowadays people focus so much on dramatization that it looks and sounds fake. Remember that forced obligation to express love and commitment is indication of brittle relationships. I have seen very strong and committed relationships between two people where they don't even feel the need to express their love or commitment. In the end, having genuine feelings is important, but how we express them depends on the people involved in thatrelationship, there is not one size fits all way to express our feelings. We don't have to subscribe to the ways that commercials related to these events recommend, we all can have our own ways to express our love and respect. Let's celebrate each and every relationship in whatever way we like, let's spread more love and kindness and make this world a better place.

Thanks for reading and please share your views on this topic.

[Copyright: Vinay Thakur. Please contact the author for re-posting or publishing]

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