Left hand and right hand, which one is right?

I have seen very few left-handed people in India. Especially during my childhood, it was very rare to spot a left-handed person. But, when I came to the USA I was surprised to see so many left-handed people. This sharp difference made me look for some reasons behind it. Is it genetic or due to a different climate or there is some other reason? While looking for possible reasons, I realized that it has to do with culture and tradition more than anything else. In India left hand is considered as a 'wrong' hand and many parents force their kids to use their right hand the time they realize that their child is using the left hand, especially while eating or writing. This happens at a very young age when the child is still trying to learn to perform his or her tasks on their own. Because of this cultural dominance of right-handedness, many kids change their "wrong" way and switch to the "correct" way. The ultimate result: they start using their 'right' hand for eating and writing and hence they ultimately become right-handed. 

Now, slowly things are changing for good. Even in India parents are more tolerant towards their kids using whatever hand they prefer while eating or writing. However, this was not the case during my childhood, this is why I think I didn't see many left-handed people around me. During my son's first India visit since he started eating on his own, when my mom saw him eating with his left hand she was really shocked. She blamed me that as a parent, I didn't make any efforts to correct this fault of his. She was worried about him using his 'wrong' hand to do pious tasks like eating, writing, or performing some religious rituals. My mom is not the only one who thinks like this, most people of her generation think like this and still, many people believe in these types of traditions. Most of them are fine with a person being a leftie in sports, rather lefties get special attention in popular sports like cricket in India, but if the same person uses his or her left hand while eating then the reactions are totally different.

I am completely opposed to this notion of right being a "right hand" and left being a "wrong hand." It should be the choice of an individual to decide which hand they want to use as their dominant hand. There is nothing right or wrong in this, it really doesn't matter. I am glad that slowly people are trying to understand this simple fact, but still, it is not acceptable to use the left hand during religious rituals. Priests often try to force a person performing the ritual to use their right hand and many oblige to this order just to avoid any confrontation or they somehow think that using their left hand is the wrong thing to do. I am sure this happens because of brainwashing since early childhood. I feel left-handed people should stick to their guns during religious ceremonies also, let these priests understand that there is nothing wrong in using the left hand, let others understand that there is nothing wrong in being a leftie, and one hand is not more pious than the other, both are equal. I know this is not easy, it might result in some struggle, also it might create some unpleasant situations or arguments, but someone needs to take the stand so that others don't suffer the same discomfort and humiliation. It will be interesting to see how my son reacts when he is told to use his right hand during some religious ritual. I am interested in knowing about the experiences of left-handed people who feel they got discriminated against or treated differently just because they use their left hand. We need to correct this bias, it is not that serious, but still, it is a bias and we must correct it.

Thanks for reading and please share your views on this topic.

[Copyright: Vinay Thakur. Please contact the author for re-posting or publishing]

Mr. Babulal Gaur, RAPE IS ALWAYS WRONG, no exceptions

Madhya Pradesh (MP) minister Mr. Babulal Gaur said that rape is a social crime and it is sometimes right and sometimes wrong. Whereas it is not surprising to hear such stupid statements from politicians, it is definitely surprising to see how frequently such statements are made. It's not that long ago when some politicians from the Samajwadi party made some derogatory remarks displaying their ignorance and male chauvinistic attitude. One can not avoid feeling dismayed after hearing such statements that too from elected lawmakers, displaying the deep male chauvinistic attitude prevalent in our society.

These types of disgusting statements make us wonder whether we are really living in the 21st century or not? These statements are largely criticized at least in social media which is somewhat comforting and a sign of encouragement. But in India, no politician has ever lost his ministership or resigned accepting their mistake after making such derogatory remarks. Politicians always try to offer some type of explanation to justify such statements and their respective governments or parties seem to be perfectly fine with their lame justifications. This shows the trivial attitude of India's political class towards such issues, they don't consider the issue of sexual violence serious enough to sack a minister or at least warn or reprimand them. Incidents of rape and sexual violence happen all over India, it is not a problem of some particular state as some people might think. This problem is rooted in male dominant nature of society and patriarchal culture where women are largely viewed as objects, not as persons. Women are treated with respect and dignity as long as they behave like women, and the definition of "behave like a woman" changes from region to region. They are supposed to remain within their limits. The moment they cross the imposed limit they are targeted, victimized, and abused in whatever way these bigots feel appropriate. Rape and murder are the result of this misogynist mindset. To stop or at least minimize such crimes any such misogynist statements must be condemned with the strongest possible words and perpetrators should be dealt with sternly, both legally and politically. Any sympathetic statement especially from people who are in government or hold any political position sends a wrong message. It derails all efforts by many organizations and individuals to create awareness about such crimes. As such it is not easy to curb these types of crimes in any patriarchal society where women are considered second-class citizens. This is why such statements are dangerous, they make the struggle of victims and their families more difficult. This is the reason I don't take any such statement lightly, these are not harmless or ignorant statements but are very detrimental statements. They are like verbal sexual assaults and should be condemned no matter who does it. The collective silence of the entire political class and their selective reactions are very worrisome. Most political parties are trying to seek some political gains from such incidents, they only criticize when it suits them, this is disgusting and sickening.

People like Mr. Babulal Gaur need to be reminded that rape is wrong, there are no exceptions. Rape is sexual violence, it is an attempt not only to injure a person physically but also psychologically. Age, clothing, gender, and desire to have sex, don't matter, rape is a crime and it is always wrong, period. Any sane person won't try to justify rape. Any such attempt should be challenged and defeated. All people like Mr. Gaur need to learn this lesson. This is important and we all need to play our part in it, if we don't fight this battle who else will? So, let's send this message loud and clear, rape is always wrong, with no exceptions, it's a heinous crime.

Thanks for reading and please share your views on this topic.

[Copyright: Vinay Thakur. Please contact the author for re-posting or publishing]

Links:

1. Rape is sometimes right, sometimes wrong: Madhya Pradesh minister Babulal Gaur

Don't use your wrong hand

My son is a leftie, which means his left hand is his dominant hand. Naturally, he uses his left hand for most of the major daily one-handed tasks (like writing, eating, and throwing). Actually, if we look around, we can easily see that the most commonly available things (like a computer mouse, cricket gloves, musical instruments like guitar, etc.) are designed with keeping right-handed people in mind just because they are in the majority. It is good to see that now left-handed versions are also available for most of these things. because of this most of the time lefties don't face any major problems, there might be a little inconvenience in getting such things but things are available for lefties also. But my son faces a huge problem whenever he goes to some Hindu religious gathering or to some pujas (a religious ritual), there he is always instructed "to use his right hand," or instructed "not to use his wrong hand" to perform rituals. This used to create lots of confusion and trouble for him. Now he is old enough to understand why people around him say this, the reason is that as right-handed people are in the majority these things are designed by only keeping them in mind. He understands this bias, but at the same time, it is puzzling to him why it is wrong to use the left hand during religious rituals? For him, the left hand is his strong and dominant hand, when someone forces him to use his right hand he doesn't understand the logic behind it. In many places he obliges and wherever possible he just ignores the instructions. If people are too rigid and adamant about using the 'right' hand then he tries to avoid those places. He tries his best to avoid any confrontation on this issue (this was one of the reasons he stopped going to ISKON gatherings). 

There are some theories and logic proposed to explain why one should use the right hand during rituals. One very common belief is that since the left hand is reserved for personal hygiene (wiping or cleaning ass after howl movements) one should always use the right hand as it's cleaner (so more pious). People from India should understand what I mean by the left hand being reserved for personal hygiene. However, this assumption is only true for right-handed people, and not every right-handed person cleans their ass with their left hand. In the past when proper sanitizers (like soap and sanitizer) were not available this thing might have made some sense, but today with all these methods at our disposal to keep us clean this tradition of using "only right hand" doesn't make any sense. It is also important to note that by insisting on using only the right hand we knowingly or unknowingly hurt people who are not right-handed, or for some reason cannot use their right hand or sometimes both hands. Such exclusionary traditions make excluded people feel awkward and abnormal. This is not a sign of an inclusive society.

I explained to my son why people insist on the use of the right hand, I also told him what are his rights as a person living in a free and democratic country. He is free to reject or accept things based on his own personal beliefs like others. I also offered him some suggestions on how to deal with these types of situations, but finally, I left it to him to choose his response and allow him to deal with these things on his own. I don't interfere unless he asks me for any help. I think now he understands people's attitudes better, he is not confused or surprised by their comments anymore, but I think not all kids get this type of support or explanation. They might start thinking that something is wrong with them or they are different than others just because they use a different hand. This might affect their confidence and behavior. Actually, we all are different and unique in some way, but still, we all are equal. We all are equal because we all are humans. Minor differences like skin color, gender, race, use of right or left hand, and sexual orientation should not result in any discrimination or discomfort to any of us. Every human should be treated with equal respect and dignity. I want my kids to grow up in a society where these differences have no place in it, where one can use whatever hand or leg (for people with no hands) to perform any ritual (religious or non-religious). This is a sign of a truly tolerant and inclusive society. I am willing to work towards building such a society and culture, are you willing to be a part of this journey?

Thank you for reading and please share your views on this topic. 

(Copyright: Vinay Thakur. Please contact the author for re-posting or publishing)

Links:

1. Why use right hand?